Wednesday, 21 September 2011

Getting a Second Date

Getting a Second Date

“You never get a second chance to make a good impression”. Isn’t that how the saying goes? We focus so hard on making an amazing first impression for that first date, but what about the second date? The second date gives a message that there might be potential for something. It is important to leave an impression well enough to secure a second date. Here are some tips, for both men and women, on how to improve chances on getting that second date.

Advice for the Guys

  1. Show true, genuine interest. Ask more questions than she asks you. You should be listening really close and always having a follow up question. It is common to assume that many men don’t enjoy listening. Prove that assumption wrong and genuinely express interest in what she is saying rather than what you are saying.
  2. Focus on positive topics. Just like anywhere else, try avoiding discussions about politics, religion, or other controversial subjects. Keep the conversation about things that she is interested in and keep it light. Remember, you can always complain the next time you are out with the guys.
  3. Give her compliments. It’s definitely a great idea to give compliments to your date, but be sure not to go overboard. Generally, more than three compliments can wind up being way too much. Telling a girl about 20 times that she is beautiful or that she has enchanting eyes can scare them away and easily change her view from positive to negative.
  4. Be inclusive. If your date mentions that she loves a certain activity, for example, maybe she loves bowling or hiking up mountains, try making an inclusive suggestion, such as “Yeah, we should do it sometime. That sounds like fun!” Her response should give you a clue on if she is interested in that second date or not.
  5. Be straight with them. Don’t leave the girl hanging. If the date didn’t go well and you don’t have any intentions on seeing her again, then be upfront and tell her. Women prefer and respect men who are straight up with them. So don’t say “I’ll call you” when you know you won’t. Of course, if you liked the date, then tell her that you’d love to see her again at the end of it.

Advice for the Ladies

  1. Be yourself. Relax. First dates can make anyone nervous. Just smile, be yourself, and relax.
  2. Show interest but don’t be an interrogator. If you keep asking one question after the other, this could intimidate him. Participate in the conversation and give him time to express his thoughts. You can show interest and get to know him without bringing a list of questions with you to interview him with.
  3. Express how you truly felt at the end of the date. If you didn’t have a good time on the date, then don’t tell him you had a good time. If you end the date saying “I really had a great time”, this is a clear signal that there is an opportunity for a second date. Be honest.

Advice for both Men and Women

  1. Silence or turn off your cell. Give your full attention to your date. No one likes it when you are taking a million calls during the date or being interrupted by annoying ringtones while in a deep conversation.
  2. Don’t bring unexpected people. Unless if it is a group date, don’t surprise your date by bringing a friend or even a relative along unexpectedly.
  3. Learn body language. Pay close attention to the body language on the first date and what it means.


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